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‘50 Million Dollar Gorilla’ was best porn film Shane Jones ever saw

Jones said he wasn’t concerned about “fancy working ladies,” but was more interested in appealing to “anyone who could take me home, because I’m a little far gone, to be honest.”

Jones said he wasn’t concerned about “fancy working ladies,” but was more interested in appealing to “anyone who could take me home, because I’m a little far gone, to be honest.”

Labour list MP and candidate for the party’s leadership Shane Jones has told a Whangarei audience today that Prime Minister John Key is the “50 million dollar gorilla,” which he added was also the title of his favourite porn film.

“This, ladies and gentlemen, is a contest to see which one of us can take out the 50 million dollar gorilla,” said Jones. “And by the way: 50 Million Dollar Gorilla? Best porno I’ve ever seen. No contest, really.”

Jones raved at length to the audience of 120, including many children, about his favourite parts of the film, and said that the protagonist – a multimillionaire dressed in a gorilla suit – was a “true, red-blooded alpha male.”

“Really, when you think about it, he’s exactly the kind of man we need in Labour,” he said, making a series of obscene hand gestures. “I tell you, this guy, he could have any woman he wanted, and believe me, by the end, he’d had a lot.”

Jones added that it would be a “big improvement” if women in the Labour caucus would behave more like the women in the film, but he didn’t expect them to, as they were “too busy trying to be brainiacs or something.”

Fellow leadership contenders David Cunliffe and Grant Robertson – who had also attended the public forum – appeared visibly uncomfortable as the event dragged on, at one point directly encouraging Jones to change the subject.

Jones obliged, proceeding to talk about some of his other favourite films, including Load Warrior and Semen Demons 2.

He said he knew his taste in movies wouldn’t sit well with “feminists and pansy-boys,” but that he wasn’t campaigning for their vote, and wanted instead to speak to “real” Labour voters, such as men with chest hair and women “who catch the train.”

“Oh, yeah, look, I mean, yeah, I don’t know,” said Jones, when asked by a female reporter if he knew that some might find his comments offensive. “I just, yeah, you see, look, I’m not a big hit with Jane Austen or whatever.”

Jones concluded the public meeting by asking the audience if anyone could take him home as he was drunk and had lost his keys.

Media reaction to the performance was largely positive, with RadioLive host Duncan Garner saying the candidate affectionately known as “Jonesy” had “stolen the show” and “really rattled Robertson in particular,” who, by contrast, appeared “a little bit too gay.”