Business & Finance

BP, Z and Mobil all insist that petrol price hikes are temporary, "in a very literal sense."

Petrol companies promise prices will come back down once peace is restored to the Middle East

The nation’s major petrol providers are trying to allay customer fears over prices, promising that they’ll move to lower them again “immediately” when the Middle East is returned to its formerly peaceful state. Prices were raised by companies nationwide this week to the tune of about 6 cents, after a […]

Air New Zealand couldn't believe its luck that this seemingly ideal piece of real estate had so far gone entirely unnoticed.

Air New Zealand identifies this enormous plot of unused land as possible second airport site

Air New Zealand’s search for a site to build a second Auckland Airport may have made a breakthrough this afternoon, after employees scanning Google satellite imagery spotted a huge, unused piece of land near the existing airport that they believe would be “perfect” for another one. “This piece of land […]

Mr. Whippy's business model has driven it down a dark road of intimidation.

Has Mr. Whippy gone too far by parking on our front lawns?

Residents in major centres around the country are becoming disgruntled by the increasingly aggressive actions of purported ice cream company Mr. Whippy, who have taken to parking on people’s front lawns and doorsteps in a desperate attempt to sell $7 watered down soft serve. Mr. Whippy is facing a series […]

Several explosions have been reported across Auckland, as well-meaning environmentalists have already begun purchasing too much petrol

Petrol companies recommend fighting climate change by buying lots of petrol and not using it

Starting from next week, customers will no longer need a car to purchase petrol directly from the pump, a development that two major fuel providers are billing as an opportunity to help fight climate change. Fuel companies BP and Z Energy are suggesting that the best way environmentally conscious Kiwis […]

Former Governor General Jerry Mateparae, pictured here during an early valuation of National MP Maureen Pugh

How many Maureen Pughs is one Chinese worth?

Yesterday former National MP Jami-Lee Ross released an explosive recording in which opposition leader Simon Bridges described one of his MPs, Maureen Pugh, as “fucking useless.” Bridges and Ross also discussed how two Chinese MPs were apparently worth more than two Indian MPs, and so we thought it was only […]

Millions of children are set to miss out on Christmas presents this year after Santa had a pretty serious run-in with the law.

Children told there won’t be any Christmas presents this year after Santa’s WINZ cheque didn’t come through

A pair of children aged 8 and 10 have been told by their single parent father there won’t be any Christmas presents this year because Santa Claus’s WINZ cheque failed to come through after he was found to have defrauded the government agency. Martin Bollard broke the news to his […]