“I’m no hero,” says man who bravely rescued drowning boy so he could harvest his organs

Jacob Turnbull says he’s mentally ill and has killed countless other children, but the boy’s family say he doesn’t need to play down his heroic actions.

“I’m no hero,” says man who bravely rescued drowning boy so he could harvest his organs

A man who rescued a drowning boy on Wednesday is humbly claiming he isn’t a hero, saying he only saved the boy to brutally harvest his organs for use in some kind of sick breeding machine. But the boy’s parents are pushing back, saying the man is just “being modest,” […]

Watercare’s Mark Bourne warns Aucklanders that if they don’t personally conserve water, someone else more conscientious will do it for them.

Council warns if Aucklanders don’t use less water, they’ll face the possibility of still having water

Auckland City Council and Watercare have warned Auckland residents today that if they don’t use considerably less water over the next month, they may be forced to continue providing them water. “We’re asking Auckland residents to reduce their water consumption by about 20 litres a day,” said Mark Bourne, spokesman […]

Starved tigers and bears to be introduced to New Zealand as bio-control measure against humans

The Ministry for Primary Industries is seeking approval this week to introduce starved and angry tigers and bears to New Zealand’s ecosystem as a bio-control measure to curb the increasingly problematic human population. MPI says the biosecurity threat caused by humans has become “alarming” in recent years, but that a […]

English also briefly addressed other elements of the response that may have been a mistake, including the initial decision to use gasoline instead of water.

PM concedes tossing Gerry Brownlee down the hill to appease the fire was ‘probably a mistake’ but ‘he will be remembered’

In his first visit to the scene of the Port Hills fires today, Prime Minister Bill English has conceded that the initial decision to roll Gerry Brownlee down the Hoon Hay Valley in an attempt to appease the fire may have been a mistake, and perhaps based on faulty science. […]

Generous Cantabrians came together last night to give food and warm clothes to vulnerable rubberneckers who had put themselves out in the cold.

Fears thousands of rubberneckers may be left with nowhere to go if fire is brought under control

As fire response crews begin to make positive steps in the containment of Christchurch’s Port Hills fire, fears are beginning to mount about the thousands of rubberneckers who may be left hopeless and with nowhere to go once the flames are finally under control. Reports are emerging this afternoon that […]

EXCLUSIVE: Five things that might not have happened on Richie McCaw’s honeymoon but are certainly physically possible

Over the weekend, New Zealand’s favourite ball-handler Richie McCaw celebrated his honeymoon with his now-wife Gemma McCaw, who conspicuously has the same last name. The McCaws rudely didn’t allow media access to their private honeymoon, so we don’t actually know what happened, or just how sweaty Richie’s wonderful thighs became. […]

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