Election 2017

James Shaw is a mess.

Can it get any worse? Now James Shaw can’t get his hand out of the garbage disposal

Just when you thought things couldn’t get any worse for the Greens, it’s happened again. Fortunes have gone from bad to worse for the previously ascendant party, after Metiria Turei’s benefit scandal spiralled further and further out of control, ultimately resulting in her resignation, and a collapse in opinion polling. […]

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The Civilian’s 2017 Election Tracker

Bill English nearly had a bad day today, after he failed to deny sending 450 text messages to Todd Barclay staffer Glenys Dickson, even acknowledging that Winston Peters may have a copy of them. Indeed, this might’ve been today’s big political story, and looked like it would be, until the […]

The former leader fears yes.

Did Andrew Little entertain hundreds of kids’ stupid bullshit for nothing?

Former Labour leader but still a massive fixture in our election coverage for budgeting and scheduling reasons Andrew Little, has opened up about his resignation today, saying he’s primarily concerned that he may have entertained the “trivial bullshit” of hundreds of children for absolutely nothing. Asked what his biggest regret […]

A Gareth Morgan is a sort of polite harbinger of death that many believe heralds the end times.

Gareth Morgan promises a TOP coalition would raise Jacinda Ardern’s kids for her

In a bold campaign move this evening, Gareth Morgan has offered a helping hand to Jacinda Ardern, saying he’ll settle the question of her having children while Prime Minister once and for all. The Opportunities Party leader says that any Labour-led coalition that includes his party will benefit from Morgan […]

The moon – also known as the big cheese – is like a second Earth but with nothing on it.

How is Labour going to get this Andrew Little advertisement off the surface of the moon in time for election day?

Jacinda Ardern’s rise to the Labour leadership yesterday was widely perceived as necessary within the party, but changing leaders less than two months out from an election can come with it some unusual consequences and major headaches. Not least of all: what Labour is going to do about the enormous […]

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Introducing The Civilian’s Election Special: How Will You Vote Will You Vote At All Will You Even Consider Voting for Gareth You Probably Shouldn’t – Part One

After three years of being forced to go about our regular lives, the election is finally here. And boy, what a start. Yes, you all know what we’re talking about: Bill English reminiscing about his English literature degree in Wellington tonight was a real hit with the voters. Is that […]