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Children told there won’t be any Christmas presents this year after Santa’s WINZ cheque didn’t come through

Millions of children are set to miss out on Christmas presents this year after Santa had a pretty serious run-in with the law.

Millions of children are set to miss out on Christmas presents this year after Santa had a pretty serious run-in with the law.

A pair of children aged 8 and 10 have been told by their single parent father there won’t be any Christmas presents this year because Santa Claus’s WINZ cheque failed to come through after he was found to have defrauded the government agency.

Martin Bollard broke the news to his children on Thursday night.

“I’m sorry, kids,” he said. “There won’t be any Christmas presents this year. Santa Claus is in a bit of a bind up in the North Pole after those BASTARDS wouldn’t pay out his WINZ cheque.”

Bollard warned his children that in the coming weeks, things may get “even more hairy” for Santa, who is due to appear in court tomorrow on a series of different charges.

His eldest child asked whether Santa had done anything wrong.

“It’s not that Santa has done anything wrong,” he explained. “He’s just been struggling a little bit since the police found him making magic crystals in his igloo.”

Even if Santa did find the money to make children’s dreams come true all around the world, he explained, he wouldn’t be able to deliver the presents, after he totalled his reindeer in a head-on accident and lost his reindeer licence.

Asked who would possibly be cruel enough to revoke Santa’s reindeer licence, Bollard replied “the fun police.”

“There are a lot of people out to get Santa right now because they’re jealous and have hate in their hearts,” he said. “They just want to tear Santa down because Santa is better than them.”

“This doesn’t affect us, though, does it, Dad?” he was asked.

“No, no, no,” he reassured them. “I just think it’s important for all children to know what’s going on with Santa right now.”

Santa Claus’s wife, Mrs. Claus, is set to receive custody of his children after a meth busting operation he “just got caught up in somehow.”