Fonterra releases world first bottle with less milk

Fonterra's Peter McClure demonstrates another of the bottle's new features: sudden detachment

Fonterra’s Peter McClure demonstrates another of the bottle’s new features: sudden detachment

Dairy giant Fonterra has announced what it calls a “world first” light-proof milk bottle that will keep its contents fresher for longer and also contain less milk.

The new bottle was unveiled yesterday at an event in downtown Auckland by Fonterra’s managing director of brands, Peter McClure, who described the bottle as a “game changer” and “Fonterra’s biggest innovation yet.”

The bottle features three layers of black and white plastic that keeps light out while raising production costs so that bottles need to be smaller and thus contain less milk.

“The genius of this bottle is that the multiple layers of different coloured plastic severely restrict both the light intake of the bottle and our operating budget” said McClure. “This means that for the first time in our company’s twelve year history, we can offer our customers even less product.”

McClure says that the new innovation was based on years of highly reliable market research.

“One of the things we found in our research was that, generally speaking, people don’t actually like milk” he said “In fact, a lot of them think it’s pretty disgusting. They’d much rather drink something different like fizzy drink or orange juice. So what we’re doing here is saying to those people ‘Hey, we hear you. We know you don’t like milk, so here, have a little less of it.’”

“Why would anyone want to drink something that comes from a cow’s tits, anyway?” he added.

McClure assured customers that, despite the addition of less milk to the product, there would be no additional charge for it. “The price will be exactly the same” he said.

The new bottles will go on sale April 8th, and Fonterra is considering only filling them half way to save people from “having to drink all that nasty milk.”