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In developing news late this evening, Treasury Secretary Gabriel Makhlouf has confirmed to media that another security breach has occurred in his department, after his emails seemed to completely disappear from his outbox. Makhlouf is not sure where exactly his emails have gone or who has stolen them, but the […]
A parliamentary sign language interpreter has been criticised for going on a bizarre, profane rant against several National Party MPs during Deputy Prime Minister Winston Peters’ post-budget address. Deaf New Zealanders watching the speech were horrified as the interpreter apparently went way off script, forgoing addressing the budget in favour […]
After a world-first role reversal in which the Government’s website crashed its budget, Finance Minister Grant Robertson has bitterly refused to publicly release the document today, saying that if people want it, they’ll “just have to go find it.” “Seeing as you’re so fucking good at it,” he added. Robertson […]
Some fucking kid has sat on a swing for 32 hours and inspired hope in a nation otherwise desperate for a hero. Hate runs rampant, political consensus seems unachievable, and it’s next to impossible to get a Buzz Bar, but New Zealanders today are heartened to know that some fucking […]
Prime Minister John Key had just spent the last two hours making phone calls and preparing the final touches to his capital gains announcement. The clock had just passed 2pm, and he was slightly late. Nothing to be worried about, though. Being late to a media engagement just gives them […]
In a bizarre move apparently outside their mandate, the Tax Working Group tasked with recommending important tax reforms has recommended 2015 movie The Big Short. “VERY INTERESTING” read the final report. “FUNNY BUT REAL DEEP AND EDUCATIONAL. REALLY TEACHES YOU ABOUT BAD MONEY PEOPLE.” “It’s very interesting,” said Michael Cullen, […]