Printing counterfeit money probably not the best idea, admits Green Party

Green Party co-leaders Russel Norman and Metiria Turei have been arrested on suspicion of producing counterfeit money, but insist they were just trying to help the economy.

Green Party co-leaders Russel Norman and Metiria Turei have been arrested on suspicion of producing counterfeit money, but insist they were just trying to help the economy.

Green Party co-leaders Russel Norman and Metiria Turei have admitted today that their policy of printing fake money and using it to pay for things was “not our best idea,” though they did believe it was “certainly up there.”

While the co-leaders said they were disappointed that the police had caught them attempting to purchase seven truckloads of Pink Batts with forged notes, they acknowledged that it was “time to give it up” and “move onto something else.”

For half a year now, under the direction of Norman, the Green Party has been forging counterfeit money and using it to purchase things as part of what it calls a “quantitative easing” scheme to help alleviate the cost of the Christchurch rebuild and bring down the New Zealand dollar.

But that scheme came to an abrupt end today as the co-leaders were escorted from their Wellington offices by police, after they were discovered to have produced potentially millions of dollars in counterfeit notes.

“Obviously, we’ve been discussing the matter with the suspects at length,” said Mike Rusbatch of the Wellington Police, “and we accept their argument that they were just trying to help the economy. Though we wouldn’t expect that to do them much good in court.”

Through a lawyer, Turei has accused Norman of being the mastermind behind the scheme, and said that she didn’t know what she was doing was illegal, as Norman had told her it was “just how the economy works.”

After the Greens solidified themselves as a mainstream party in 2011, Norman was tasked with helping his caucus figure out what the economy was. Since then, Norman has been attending level 100 economics courses at Victoria University, something that friends say has given him “a lot of ideas.”

Speaking to media today as he was escorted to the back of a police car, Norman said that he figured there could be nothing wrong with New Zealand having more money, and because the election wasn’t until next year, he wanted to get started on the project now.

To help undo any damage done by the Greens’ scheme, the Government is now urging retailers to go through their cash and check for any notes that appear to be crudely hand-drawn.